Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
Autism is a complex neurodevelopmental condition that affects millions of people worldwide.
It is characterized by difficulties in social interaction, communication, and repetitive behaviors.
Although autism is becoming more widely recognized, there is still a lack of understanding and awareness surrounding the condition.
As a result, many individuals and families affected by autism struggle to find the support and resources they need.
Why Not Me The World podcast aims to bridge that gap by providing valuable information and insights into autism, fostering empathy and understanding, and promoting acceptance and inclusion.
Nashville based Music Producer Tony Mantor explores the remarkable impact his guests make by empowering their voices in spreading awareness about autism and helping break down the barriers of understanding.
Join Mantor and his guests as they delve into the world of autism and mental health to explore topics such as diagnosis, treatment, research, and personal stories.
Together, we can create a more informed and compassionate society for individuals with autism.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
Ashley Smith: from crisis to advocacy
Ashley Smith, an advocate, author, and speaker, shares her powerful journey of recovery from schizophrenia and how she transformed a legal crisis into a platform for mental health advocacy.
Through her blog "Overcoming Schizophrenia," seven self-published books, and work with organizations like NAMI and the Curious Foundation, Ashley demonstrates that recovery is possible and helps others find their path forward.
• Diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia at age 20 after a legal intervention involving a police chase with a military truck
• Successfully manages schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and depression through medication and strong support systems
• Works as a Certified Peer Specialist helping others navigate their own mental health journeys
• Educates law enforcement through Crisis Intervention Team training on handling mental health emergencies
• Founded the "Overcoming Schizophrenia" blog in 2008, recognized among the top 20 schizophrenia blogs worldwide
• Has self-published seven books and provides coaching to aspiring authors
• Emphasizes that recovery takes many different forms and is possible with proper support
Contact Ashley through her blog Overcoming Schizophrenia, find her books at amazon.com/author/Smith.Ashley, or email her directly at ashleysmith6082@gmail.com.
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intro/outro music bed written by T. Wild
Why Not Me the World music published by Mantor Music (BMI)
Welcome to why Not Me? The World Podcast, hosted by Tony Mantor, broadcasting from Music City, usa, nashville, tennessee. Join us as our guests tell us their stories. Some will make you laugh, some will make you cry. Their stories Some will make you laugh, some will make you cry. Real life people who will inspire and show that you are not alone in this world. Hopefully, you gain more awareness, acceptance and a better understanding for autism Around the World. Hi, I'm Tony Mantour. Welcome to why Not Me? The World Humanity Over Handcuffs the Silent Crisis special event.
Speaker 1:Joining us today is Ashley Smith. She's an advocate, an author and a speaker. In 2008, she established the Overcoming Schizophrenia blog. It offers her candid journey of recovery. She then went on to self-publish her first book, what's On my Mind. It's a collection of blog entries for overcoming schizophrenia. Recently, a popular review recognized Ashley's blog among the top 20 schizophrenia blogs and websites to follow. Ashley continues to show that schizophrenia is not going to stop her from being a voice to help many people. She's here to tell us her journey, her experiences, and it's a pleasure to have her here. Thanks for coming on.
Speaker 2:Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1:Oh, it's my pleasure. Glad to have you here. I understand that you do a lot of writing.
Speaker 2:Yes, I am. Yes, I've been blogging since 2008 and I just had a thing for writing.
Speaker 1:What led you to get into writing?
Speaker 2:I'm not sure Self-expression creativity. As a child growing up I had a journal and teachers gave me compliments on my writing, on my essays growing up in grade school. So I just have a joy for words and putting them together and making them sound lively and passionate and good.
Speaker 1:So once you got into that, that actually led you to writing a book about schizophrenia.
Speaker 2:Yes, I wrote my own blog book on my experiences living with schizophrenia. I'm in recovery.
Speaker 1:I think that's really good that you did this. What events, if any, led up to you actually sitting down and writing the book?
Speaker 2:I've been wanting to share my story in recovery for a very long time. I actually had the opportunity to meet up with a peer who is also a self-published author and she guided me through the steps of self-publishing. It was actually her idea just to put my blog articles together to get my story out there, and so she walked me through the process. And then I have these blog books. My first blog book came out back in 2014,. What's On my Mind?
Speaker 1:You say recovery. Can you explain or expand what you mean by recovery?
Speaker 2:Yes, I'm in recovery, living with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder and depression. It's a lot going on but it's very manageable and I'm grateful that I'm in recovery and I'm grateful that I'm doing well today.
Speaker 1:What led to your diagnosis and which condition was identified first, given that some of your diagnosis seemed to overlap, I got diagnosed through a legal situation.
Speaker 2:It was really out of character. It was a family crisis. It was just a mess. When I was 20 years old, I took a break from college and I relocated to spend some time with family. I had wide range of symptoms. I heard voices. I saw spirits and ghosts. I thought people were gossiping about me. I even thought people were trying to kill me and poison people in my family, and so I didn't recognize the signs of mental illness. I didn't know that I was hallucinating or having these illusions. Even when I thought it was Jesus Christ, I didn't know something was wrong. And so one day I just decided I want to go back home, I want to make things right again, I want to fix things.
Speaker 2:So I got up and went to the airport. I cashed my last check, went to the airport by public transportation in San Diego and I tried to get a flight back home to Atlanta. But I felt very uneasy and uncomfortable and it was quite a journey to get there. I was familiar with the public transit system, but this day I was confused. I didn't know what was happening and I was afraid of everybody, even the taxi driver.
Speaker 2:When I got, when I took the taxi from downtown and so I ended up walking aimlessly around the grounds of the airport and I saw this pickup truck. And I'm thinking to myself oh my God, this is my blessing, because I thought everyone was against me. I thought everyone was trying to kill me, including family, and so I got in this pickup truck and started driving. As I'm driving this pickup truck, I hear this hip hop song on the radio and the lyrics. The hook is girls, girls, girls, don't be suicidal. Now this is the second time I thought the devil was trying to communicate with me through the television and now through the radio, and so I'm thinking that I'm dealing with a spiritual war and that he's trying to get me to kill myself. And I'm highly spiritual and religious at this time. I'm so spiritual today.
Speaker 2:But to make a long story short, I went on a high school chase with the police. I was arrested and jailed and hospitalized for five months. During the course of those months, I learned about my diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia. It wasn't fearful or frightening to have the diagnosis because I had a very good doctor, dr Wu. He told me I can go back to school as long as I take my medication and manage my stress, and so that's been my foundation of recovering. That legal intervention, dr Wu, told me I can go back and do what I want to do as long as I just take my medication, and so that was the beginning of my recovery back in 2007.
Speaker 1:After receiving your diagnosis, how did it impact your mental capacity and overall cognitive functioning, what thoughts or emotions surfaced as a result, and how did you approach the process of rebuilding and starting new?
Speaker 2:It was a process and reflecting on what I know today. Looking back, I had some symptoms in high school, but it didn't affect my ability to function until my third year at the university, and so I had a lot of symptoms. I mean, I thought that everyone in the jail was trying to poison me. I thought everyone was in on the cafeteria staff was putting stuff and poisoning my food and things like that. So I dumped the train intentionally to not get in trouble for it, and then the phones weren't working after hours and then I would go to seclusion and it was just. I was just a mess. But fortunately I was forced to medicate and I'm really grateful for that intervention, because I was not going to take the medication. I didn't understand what was happening to me or that I was not well. Everyone else thought but me. I've been on medication since then. I've been doing very, very well with my recovery. I'm just very fortunate to find medication that works well for me.
Speaker 1:Now that you're doing well, you've taken steps to help others and share valuable knowledge Beyond writing your book. What are some of the specific actions you've taken to share your story Around writing your book? What are some of the specific actions you've taken to share your story? Inspire people and demonstrate that even when life takes a difficult turn, it's possible to overcome challenges and lead a very fulfilling life.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, and, as I mentioned, this was a family crisis because my family put a missing persons report on me.
Speaker 2:No one knew where I went or what happened or why I left just all of a sudden, and so in my recovery, my mom told me that she saw me telling people how I made it through, and this was in jail, in the hospital, in the state hospital, when she used to visit me daily and we would do exercises, we'd read the Bible, we'd talk about my plans when I got out of jail and things like that, and so it was just very it's been a process, and ever since then, I've been wanting to not only help myself but help other people, and so we were introduced to NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, through Dr Wu and my treatment team at the hospital, and I've been a member of NAMI since 2009.
Speaker 2:Me and my family went to an educational meeting and they met once a month back then and we got to mingle with other individuals who had diagnosis and family members and caregivers, and it was quite an experience because it left a lasting impression on me, because it gave me the desire to want to volunteer for the organization. So I got heavily involved in NAMI, georgia, and I've worked in several capacities. I am a state trainer today. I've been a board member, I've been a facilitator mentor, I worked on the non-emergency helpline resource line, and so I've done quite a lot with the organization. It's been quite a journey and I'm enjoying it. I'm enjoying giving back. I'm enjoying learning more about myself and about my diagnosis, not only through my blogging, but also through my volunteer work and meeting other people on these trainings and things like that.
Speaker 1:So is your blog one where people can reach out to you and comment, or is it just a blog for people to read and just learn from your writings?
Speaker 2:It's kind of both. I'm not expecting anyone to really comment, I just share. I reflect on my experiences and so I write a lot and I try to write about once a week and sometimes people leave me a gift and leave a comment and I respond. Sometimes I have guest bloggers on my blog, overcoming Schizophrenia, and that's been a nice experience for both of us.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I get that completely. There's no instant gratification from blogs or podcasts or anything like that, but every now and then you'll get someone that will reach out to you and tell you how you've helped them or how your blog made a difference in what they're doing with their life. When you get something like that, it makes a difference in your life because you know what you're doing is helping.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, and through my blog. It's interesting I've learned so much more about the mental health community. Now I'm also on the Advisory Council with Curious Foundation, and so I share my experience on the meetings and also give advice to other individuals who are in crisis or who need more support family members, caregivers, individuals like myself who are also in recovery.
Speaker 1:Could you expand on what the Curious Foundation is and what you do with it?
Speaker 2:The Curious Foundation is an awareness organization and we promote medication for people living with a diagnosis and we encourage them to consider it when all else fails, try medication and just learn more about the diagnosis and to seek help. We have bi-monthly meetings the Cures Foundation, which I sit on the advisory council of and so we talk to different families and individuals who may be going through situations like myself when they had to file a missing persons report or other crises where the individuals living in recovery or who are now on medication more become homeless or something like that, and so we talk situations and stories through so that people feel supported.
Speaker 1:So I'm sure that by doing this, that you are learning a lot of things yourself. You're seeing things that you wasn't sure of. Can you give us an idea of what it is now by doing this that you learn and in turn, it helps you evolve even more?
Speaker 2:The first thing I learned was that mental illness is not what people seem it seems to be. There's so many myths out there. The stigma is so strong. I didn't know what schizophrenia was until I was diagnosed with it. When the doctors told me about hallucinations, I didn't know what they were talking about, and so that's the major milestone for me is understanding what am I really dealing with? What is schizophrenia, and what does it mean for me and my family? And I really go back to saying how it impacts me and my family, because, even though this is an individual medical diagnosis, it impacts all of the person and their family, their loved ones, and so another thing that I've learned is that recovery is possible.
Speaker 2:Medication is one way, and there's several other possibilities as to how to reach recovery. I don't define recovery by medication. I define it by how we manage our coping skills to get through trying times, daily struggles and stressors, and the things that I've learned through the GERIS Foundation is that how do you provide support and care to someone that doesn't understand? They have a diagnosis that's gone through some of those poor symptoms dealing with schizophrenia where they're not aware that they even have a medical condition, even though everyone is telling them their doctor, their family, their friends hey, you have schizophrenia, take your medication and everything will be okay. It's not a sense of denial, it's a symptom of the condition. I was very fortunate to overcome that part of my condition through the medication the forced medication for me in my situation. But those are just a few things that I've learned, and also that we're a strong community.
Speaker 2:A lot of people don't know what schizophrenia is or what NAMI is, and the thing is it's a strong subgroup. There are a lot of individuals like myself who are living in recovery, who are working, who have families, who are giving back to the community and to their churches, and so the world and society in Hollywood doesn't see this. They have no idea about this movement that we have going on, about some of us coming up and sharing our recovery experiences. I've shared my story with law enforcement in the past through the crisis intervention team training. For those of us that don't know what that means, it's educating law enforcement how to de-escalate crisis situations of persons who are going through a situation with either substance abuse or mental health, so that, instead of using excessive force or taking us to jail, the police officer, the CIT officer, will take us to the hospital.
Speaker 1:Your blogs often address topics like schizophrenia, adhd and other mental health conditions which carry such a heavy stigma. Many people don't fully understand these conditions. As you said, their perceptions can be skewed. What changes have you observed in how people view these issues through your work? How can we further break down that stigma so others can see what you're emphasizing? That it's not the end of the world. It's about getting the correct medication, gaining control and showing people they can live fulfilling lives they might not have thought possible.
Speaker 2:Yes, exactly, and so I've been involved in quite a few projects. One, for example, is a Janssen Pharmaceutical company made an educational video called Linguine Schizophrenia A to their training and classes and support groups and things like that. So that's one avenue. Another way that I've advocated for myself and for others is by not only sharing my story but, like I said, working with law enforcement, and so I'm going to do a refresher and continue working with law enforcement.
Speaker 2:I took a break from that program but I'm getting back involved in that specific program and so I'm educating law enforcement on how I was handled through this situation, things that could have been handled differently, and my perception when I was being arrested and jailed, and also the aftermath, the after effect, because, like early on I said, I'm appreciative and fortunate to have a legal intervention and forced medication that got me out of that symptom of not being aware that I even have a diagnosis. So that was, that was a huge, that was a huge success for me in my recovery is just getting past that initial phase of understanding hey, I have a diagnosis, which is big, and then, hey, I got to take my medication to control how has the police responded to your initiatives and the goals you're striving to achieve with your work?
Speaker 1:Are they embracing what you're trying to do or have you faced any pushback with your efforts?
Speaker 2:It's interesting. This is a tough group to talk to, as you can imagine. I mean, they're thrown in for a ball's crisis all the time, and sometimes it opens up conversations that I really appreciate. Most of the time, there's not going to be a lot of conversation back and forth, but through this specific program Enter On Voice, when I shared it in the past I've learned that they'll pull me aside after the presentation to ask questions and they'll tell me about someone they may have known, who they interacted with while they're on their job or even in their families, and so, like I said, law enforcement is a tough group to talk to about different situations, but I'm just very fortunate to have the opportunity to share my specific story so they can get the other side and see who's now in recovery.
Speaker 1:So true, Law enforcement officers often have to make quick decisions about how to handle a situation. The more they understand the context, the better equipped they are to respond effectively. That's a big part of why it's valuable for them to see someone like you who has faced these kinds of challenges and come out on the other side. It demonstrates that people have the ability to take a difficult path, turn things around and make something positive out of it.
Speaker 2:Most definitely. Yes, my recovery experience has been very empowering for me and for other people learning about my situation with the pickup truck. It actually wasn't an ordinary pickup truck I took from the airport. It was a military pickup truck, so I was facing felony charges, but fortunately I was able to get those charges reduced to misdemeanors with time served, because I learned about my diagnosis and had no criminal record whatsoever before this situation occurred.
Speaker 1:Did the legal system provide the resolution or the support you needed to navigate your situation and emerge successful, as you hoped that it would?
Speaker 2:Yes, I had a great experience with a jail worker and a few of the nurses in the psych ward of the jail. I remember this social worker named Miss Elaine and she referred me to a few different programs and, being 20 years old at the time, I really wanted to be more independent, and so she guided me to a personal care home as well as a program for youth with mental illness and substance abuse, and in that program I learned more about my diagnosis, especially through the program WRAP, the Wellness Recovery Action Plan by Mary Ellen Copeland. And ever since then I've been inspired to be a mentor, to be a peer counselor, and that's what I'm doing today. When I'm not writing books, when I'm not taking care of my family and my pets, I'm actually a peer counselor, called a certified peer specialist here in Georgia, and what that means is the main criteria to be a CPS is to have a diagnosis, have a mental health diagnosis.
Speaker 2:I've been a CPS since 2012, even though I've been working with NAMI since 2009. I was doing work before I was actually doing the work, and so I support people and their goals going back to work, going back to going into group home, taking care of their families, whatever it is that they're working on, just getting on medication again, and so I really love what I do. Back in grade school I wanted to be an actress, but then, when I graduated, I wanted to be a social worker, and so this is another form of social work being a CPS a certified peer specialist.
Speaker 1:What happens when you encounter people you've mentored or guided through tough times who just didn't seem to grasp what you were saying or take it in. Maybe they even pushed back a bit? How did you manage to break through that resistance and help them understand so they could still move forward?
Speaker 2:I think that, being a CPS or doing any type of work, it's important to build rapport with the individuals, whoever you're working with, and so I love talking to people, I love supporting people and so just sharing my story and them knowing that, hey, I have a diagnosis similar to theirs or like exactly like theirs, that gives them a lot of hope, and I've actually seen firsthand how my blog books my sharing my story locally through my blog has helped other people and empowered them to be authors, to share their memoir or to share their blog stories.
Speaker 1:Have you ever felt like things weren't going well, Like you weren't sure if you were getting through to someone? Then one day, it's like the light switch just turned on. Everything clicked and from there you were able to keep nurturing that relationship to guide them towards a better place for themselves.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, I've worked with quite a few individuals and I'm tuned to come in at the forefront where the communication was really soft and really hard, and early on, because it was an icebreaker. It takes time to develop these relationships and so now that in the beginning this individual wasn't talking as much or they'll give short, brief answers or responses, now their face lights up and now they're looking forward to our sessions and the opening up about different things I would never thought was going on or just noticed because there's just more vocal now, and so that has been really empowering and motivating for me to continue doing this work.
Speaker 1:That's great. It's always nice to have a success story. So what are your goals now? What do you see yourself doing in the next three to five years? How do you make this bigger and better for yourself and the ones you're helping?
Speaker 2:Yes, and on top of my blog books, I've developed some other books. I've actually self-published seven books today. As of today, I have seven books out on my Amazon author page amazoncom slash author slash Smith, ashley and so I've inspired other people to write books and I want to do more book coaching. I've done some book coaching in the past, before COVID, and guided people on different aspects of book writing, and so I want to get back strongly involved in that where I could kind of step back a little bit from being the CPS and be more of the book coach. And so I want to get back strongly involved in that where I could kind of step back a little bit from being the CPS and be more of the book coach. And so that's one of my major goals in the next few years is to facilitate more writing classes.
Speaker 1:I think that's great. Creativity can always help people feel better about themselves, so that's a great thing. Now, how many organizations are you working with?
Speaker 2:Two NAMI Georgia and Curious Foundation.
Speaker 1:Do you see yourself growing within either one of the organizations to a higher level of service?
Speaker 2:I might.
Speaker 2:I might explore being a board member again.
Speaker 2:I might apply down the road in the next few years, but right now I'm just continuing to facilitate training and to participate in other workshops and things like that to share my story with law enforcement, and so I'm content with the capacity that I'm in now. But I also really want to see people's response after they hear my story, like have the conversations that I've had with some people. I've been very fortunate to have some people like oh, I would never have thought of this X Y Z. Or you've encouraged me to write a book. Very fortunate to have some people like oh, I would never have thought of this X Y Z. Or you encourage me to write a book, you've encouraged me. I feel like I can do this. I hear that a lot now through the Cures Foundation. When I give advice sometimes to the caregivers and family, they really appreciate the insight, as well as the other individuals on the board sharing their recovery experiences, and so I love those moments of giving back and seeing the reactions and having a dialogue about it.
Speaker 1:Have you had anyone that's questioned you? You tell them what you went through, you tell them what you're doing now and they question you, saying well, yours wasn't as bad as mine, and they're really not comparing apples to apples on the diagnosis.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:How did you put it across to them to get them to understand that it doesn't matter which one was worse. They can only focus on the now and focus on working towards a better life for themselves.
Speaker 2:Yes, most definitely. That's a very good angle to look at things, because sometimes people assume that I didn't have it as bad or that I appear superhuman, and that simply is not the case. My last hospitalization was actually 2003. And that took me out of work for several months I mean what? Four to six months and so I had to really focus on my recuperation and my building myself up again to get to where I am today, and so I just share my story and experience and just building that relationship. It helps in the long run and it's very motivating to both sides to me and to the peer.
Speaker 1:What's one of the craziest questions you've been asked. Then you had to turn it around for them, because what they were looking at and what it really was was not the perception that they actually thought it was.
Speaker 2:I can't think of any questions right now, but I have thought of statements that were very bizarre and cold. I've done many talking and speaking engagements where I share my recovery experience in different groups shelters, nonprofits, law enforcement, different groups of people and someone actually got up and said hey, you're demonic. And so me and my co-facilitator took control of that conversation, which was a great opportunity to break the stigma and debunk those myths and be like no, this is not what you think it is. This is a medical condition. It has nothing to do with our faith and religion and this is characterized by, you know, different aspects and symptoms of mental health, but it's a medical condition and I am not demonic and I am just like you, you know. So that was. I've been called demonic a couple of times in my experience, which was very hurtful, but again it opened the door for that conversation, which is what I want to debunk the mess and to reduce the stigma.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's really good that that happened for you that way and you was able to handle it. Now, what would you like to tell the listeners that you think is very important that they need to know about what you're doing with your journey?
Speaker 2:I think that question sounded so simple, but it's so complex to me. When it comes to schizophrenia, I would say that schizophrenia requires a lot of support from loved ones, from your treatment team, self-awareness and acceptance. But that's not, it's not a one way to recovery. There's several different paths. So, even if an individual does not accept the diagnosis, they can still be in recovery and have a quality life, taking medication, getting you know, staying involved with family and friends and in the community, and things like that. What point I really want to drive home is that recovery is possible. It's possible through several avenues, different avenues. Everyone doesn't have to fit the same box, the same hat, the same shoe and that I think that the top things that helped me in my recovery was therapy, my support system, my family and everybody, as well as organizations such as NAMI, having the peer support to show me an example of what recovery could look like.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a great message. It sure is. Now tell our listeners how they can contact you and find you.
Speaker 2:If your community would take a look at my blog Overcoming Schizophrenia, or at my books on Amazon, amazoncom. Slash author, slash Smith, Ashley. Or if you want to talk to me directly, ashleysmith6082 at gmailcom. Again, my email is ashleysmith6082 at gmailcom.
Speaker 1:That's awesome. This has been a great conversation, great information. I really appreciate you taking the time to come on. Thank you so much for having me, tony. It's been my pleasure. Thanks again, thanks for taking the time out of your busy schedule to listen to our show today. We hope that you enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed bringing it to you. If you know anyone that would like to tell us their story, send them to TonyMantorcom Contact then they can give us their information so one day they may be a guest on our show. One more thing we ask tell everyone everywhere about why Not Me, the world, the conversations we're having and the inspiration our guests give to everyone everywhere that you are not alone in this world.